My fault
by QueenSkellington
Summary: Simba's thoughts as he runs out into the desert. Pre-Lion King 2 Warning: Angst.


During the scene after the stampede and after the hyenas chased him off, but before he meets Timon and Pumba. Very Angst-y.

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing of LK

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I swallowed hard as I ran. A faint echo rang behind me,

"If you ever come back, we'll kill ya!" My stomach felt like it was going to drop out of me, my throat felt like I hadn't visited the watering hole in weeks, my heart felt like it was beating to fast. Everything was wrong, and it was all….my….fault. Wetness trickled down the side of my face.

"Dad, dad. It… I… I didn't mean to! I did-d-dn't me-e-ean to-o-o…" I gasped out as more tears fell down my face, soaking the light tan fur to a brown shade. I closed my eyes and shook my head, it was all my fault, my mother was going to hate me, and I'd doomed the kingdom by taking away there king. I should've died, not him.

I wasn't brave enough, I wasn't strong enough, I wasn't good enough. And it had cost dad his life. I opened my eyes again as my paws scathed the ground. The sun was falling beneath the horizon which made me smile bitterly.

_The rule of the Pride Lands is like the sun. One day the sun will set on my time as king. And then you, you will be king._ His words echoed in my head and my eyes burned with more tears. The sun was setting all right, setting on my dad, setting on the pride, just ending all together. There was no way I could be King, not after this. Not after I had shamed my family in such a horrible way, murdering my own father.

The combination of sobbing and running was too much for my lungs and I was forced to stop. I looked at the purple-red sky and whispered,

"G-Goodbye dad… and I promise, I will _never _be King. I will _never _steal that from you, not like I stole your l-l-life…" I was forced to stop as my throat felt too tight and my shoulders shook as I cried and the sun faded to complete darkness. I blinked as my eyes adjusted to the diminished light, turning everything black and white. I stared at the sky as the stars slowly started sparking to life. I momentarily wondered about Nala, what she would think of me just… disappearing.

I had so much on my mind; I did not much have much space to worry about friends. I couldn't believe what a failure of a Prince I was. The title 'Prince' burned and I winced, no what a failure of a lion. I looked up at the stars and wondered where I would go. What would happen to me? Where could a cub, weighted down with so much guilt, go? What could possibly happen to me that would make me feel worse?

The stars glittered above with so much brilliance I could hardly believe it, and for a moment… the pain numbed. The sting in my heavy chest dulled, the razor edge dulling slightly.

_…The great Kings of the past look down on us…_

His words bounced in my skull.

"Dad?" I whispered, "Dad?" I stared up as if expecting something amazing to happen.

"Oh, dad. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to kill you. The wildebeests… it wasn't my fault. And now… now you're gone." I told the sparkling stars, and as I stared at the stars I smiled. I don't know why, but I did. I smiled, it felt odd. Smiling and still being so sad, so guilty.

The wind swirled, dust clouds kicking up and roaming atop the hard packed dirt.

"I-I won't die, I swear. That is something I will promise you. I won't die out here. Not after you died to save me, I can at least give you that." I said boldly. I think those are the most serene words I'd ever spoken. That's what happens when something like that happens, I had to grow up. To survive, to tolerate.

I felt the air cool, and I looked away from the stars. The blade of guilt sliced at my chest again and I whispered out a slight gasp as I started up in a run again, keeping a stoic front. I stared ahead; the world would move on, I knew it would. It would hurt, I knew every time I thought about dad, that sharp blade of guilt would cut me. But I could be alive, I could live and run and breathe, because of my dad's bravery. I had to capture this bravery; I had to be like him, had to keep going to carry on his memory.

"I swear, I will _live._" I whispered out again as I ran farther into the desert into my fate…

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I know personally what it is like to lose a parent so I took this from the movie and my personal experience to form…. this. Well, if it suck's tough. Just no flaming please, I'm sort of spilling my guts here. ~ QueenSkellington.


End file.
